I am not a patient person. Partially.Patience has just never come naturally to me.You know, we live in an instant world. We have instant (or almost instant) travel. We have instant access to information and entertainment. We even have instant food orders, potatoes(I had to) .
But even with it being an instant world, we often hear the saying,
“Good things come to those who wait”
And up until recently, I never thought that my lack of patience was a problem. It was just one piece of a patchwork of qualities that made me unique. Then I came to the realisation that this trait was holding me back in many areas of my life — school, relationships and, most of all, my personal development.
In any given situation, if I wasn’t seeing the results I wanted almost instantly I became frustrated and disappointed, leading me to label it or, in most cases, myself as a failure. So I gave up. Deemed myself unworthy.
I was so caught up in this age of immediate satisfaction, in getting what I want pretty much all the time, that I had become incapable of delaying gratification
But where has this gotten me? Nowhere!
I had been conditioned to expect everything to happen easily and quickly, and that’s just not the way life works.
So, I set out to find the tools I would need to become a more patient person. I learnt that patience is a skill. And like any other skill, it can be learnt, developed and mastered.
It’s easy to be impatient, it’s easy to doubt the choices you have made and it’s easy to feel as if the seeds you have planted are simply never going to grow, no matter how much time you spend tending to them.
I think we all feel like that from time to time and I can assure you I have destroyed many a metaphorical garden in my moments of impatience, anger and frustration.
One thing I’ve learnt about life over the years, is that you have to learn to be comfortable with the choices you make. It’s easy to keep second guessing yourself and wondering if you’ve made the right move, but at some point you just have to make a call and stick with it for a little while.
The thing about life and the creation of life or an idea is that you have to bring a certain level of certainty to the party, otherwise your baby, your flower or your empire simply won’t thrive.
When you plant your seed, make a decision or make a move you’ve got to back yourself and believe that it will be everything you envision and hope it will be.
You’ve got to give everything in your life, time to grow and develop, that is true for your relationships, your career, your dreams and especially yourself.
I know so many of you are so anxious to see something pop out from underneath the ground, you so badly want to see results and want it to all happen right now. But that is simply not how life works and anything meaningful and beautiful takes many years to develop.
The thing that kills more dreams than anything else is a lack of patience. Not allowing yourself to develop, not giving yourself a chance to understand the process and learn the lessons of life, is what keeps you from growing and flourishing.
So next time you make a move or a decision or start a new job or relationship, give it time to grow and see where it takes you, if you just tend to it with great care and allow the passing of time to do its thing.
Sometimes you will make a bad decision or plant the wrong seed at the wrong time, but that’s life and like any beautiful garden or masterpiece it is okay to rip it up and start again.
But before you do that, give yourself time to see things through, because you just never know.
No matter what life change you’ve gone through, realize some days are going to be easier than others. Allow yourself time to readjust, to recalibrate, to rethink the way you do things. Know that it’s not going to be easy, but if something good comes out it (and chances are it will), it’ll all be worth it.